Abu El Abed Late to Work
One day Abu El Abed (AA)was very late for work, so he was driving very fast. Unfortunately he hit a guy who was
walking on the street. AA stopped immediately and got out of the car to see if the guy is ok:
Guy: Shou mish shayifni? (you didn't see me?)
AA: Mbaleh, bass mish zaker wayn. (Yes, but I don't remember
where)
The Puzzle
Abu El Abed (AA) became a very rich man. One day while he was in a meeting with his directors, Em El Abed (EA)
dropped by and gave him a big puzzle box.
He kicked every body out of the conference room and locked the door. A few hours later EA knocked the door but
AA did not reply. AA stayed inside the conference room for days and months..
After 2 years he came out.
AA: 2 years.. 2 years.. I won
People around him: what do you mean ya AA, we thought you were dead!
AA: look ya hameer, it is written on the box 3 to 5 years... I solved it in 2
years!!!
Good Business
One day Abu El Abed (AA) decided to try his luck in a new business in the United States. He left for the U.S. and
started selling clothes and sleeping equipment. Six months later he called Em El Abed (EA) and said..
AA: " Em El Abed doubi chantek ou ta3eh la hawn. " (EA pack your clothes and come here)
EA: " Leish ya AA ? " (Why AA ?)
AA: " Be3et miyet farsheh ou khams miyet kilot ou rbehet 150 000 Dollar." (I sold one hundred
mattresses and five hundred underwear and made a profit of 150 000 Dollars)
EA: " Eh inta doub chntak ou ta3a la hawn. Ana bi farsheh ouahdeh ou bala kilot rbehet 200 000
Dollar. " (You pack your bags and come here. With one mattress and no underwear I made a profit
of 200 000 Dollars.)
Abed the Alcoholic
Abu El Abed (AA) noticed that Abed has started drinking 3araq (alcohol) every night, which AA did not like. One
night AA wanted to show Abed the harmful effects of alcohol. He took Abed to the backyard, he filled 2 big
buckets, one with water and the other one with alcohol.
AA asked Abed to bring the donkey in front of the buckets. The donkey smelled both, and start drinking from the
one filled with water.
AA: Abed you see how the donkey drank water and not alcohol. Can you tell me
why?
Abed: sure, la-enno hmar. (because hi is a donkey)
AGood Restaurant !!!
Abu Abed was telling his friend Abu Steif about a restaurant...
Abu Abed : When you go in to this restaurant every body come and greet you... Then they serve as much as you want drinks for FREE... After that they serve the best food and all type of Mezze all FREE..
Abu Steif : All Free are you sure ??
Abu Abed : Not only this when you finish eating they offer you all types of dessert also FREE !!
Abu Steif : All Free are you sure Abu Abed ??
Abu Abed : And after you finish eating and drinking they put music for you so you can dance and then they take you to the backroom where you can have sex as much as you want All For FREE !!!
Abu Steif : All Free are you sure ??
Abu Abed : And after you finish the owner of the restaurant comes and gives $100.- and thank you for coming and invites you to come everyday !!!
Abu Steif : All Free and they also give you money ... This is Impossible Abu Abed ... Have you been to this restaurant yourself ??
Abu Abed : Myself I have not been there, but I am telling you it is true... My wife Em Abed goes there everyday and they give her $100.-
